JZX Update Apr, 05, 2011

The month of March began with an unholy smell as uncertainty in the energy sector caused an overproduction of gas, which sparked volatility in interaction and odor related assets for the first half of the month. The last two weeks of exchanges featured a death theme as a virus caused a literal market crash. Never the less overall winners beat out losers with broader sentiment positive.

March’s raging bull was the sick sector as shares continue to rise on a cloud of hey fever and bacteria. Residue effects from allergies assets are wreaking havoc in the sight related exchanges as each morning becomes more and more blurred. However that hasn’t stop Z Voyeur Media Corp from rising more than 20% on the month after the discovery of a neighbor that has lost weight and doesn’t mind showing it.
Greed and selfishness saw nice earnings as the sentimental market exchanges border on exploitation. As a result of perceived market Greed and Selfishness guilt shares also had a strong end of the month. To spite the recent continued decline in kitchen stocks Z Chef Cuisine Corp surprised the market after the results of the NYC style Chinese food (Chicken & Broccoli) experiment proved successful. The full reverberations are expected to be quite positive for market humor going into the future.

Having more difficulty during the month of March were the party stocks with Zo Charming Corp leading the way as a real lack of interest in kissing ass and pretending to be interested persists. Stupidity came alive, in an unexpected turn of events, as the intellectual sector was pushed off the bookshelf by health problems. Attention span suffered greatly after sick and allergy stocks rose, as did throat shares. Memory assets have also been in difficulty leading to a fear of early on set dementia, though the allegations remain unsubstantiated and have been attributed to Jewish paranoia.

Treasuries were on a positive swing with strong emotional sentiment present after the JZX monetary system was deregulated. Long-term instruments saw a slight rise, while short to medium term bonds were stable. Overall the JZX interest rate was a little better than last month.